Monday, November 28, 2022
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Elon Musk Touts Mission To Educate Neuralink Monkeys To Commit Sexual Harassment

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SAN FRANCISCO—In a long-awaited product replace from the startup that has developed brain-machine interfaces so rhesus macaques can play video video games with their minds, Elon Musk revealed a brand new undertaking Monday that may educate monkeys outfitted with Neuralink chips to sexually harass their coworkers. “Utilizing state-of-the-art mind implants, we are able to practice monkeys to know what skilled boundaries are and the way they are often transgressed in a extremely inappropriate and sexual method,” mentioned Musk, explaining how Neuralink’s Bluetooth-enabled chips could possibly be used to activate the motor cortex of a primate in order that it administers undesirable massages within the office or makes use of rudimentary signal language to touch upon a coworker’s physique. “Admittedly, there have been a couple of glitches to this point, with a number of of the monkeys asking for permission earlier than partaking in lewd habits and, in some instances, even stopping after they heard the phrase ‘no.’ However yesterday we received a monkey to make use of its thoughts to ship an image of its genitals to the girl who solutions the telephones right here.” A number of sources at Neuralink mentioned that Musk, in an try to encourage monkeys to masturbate in an workplace setting, would normally place them behind a desk and eagerly stroke their erect penises.



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